The limitations we put on ourselves

Power of belief

Just as powerful as the feeling you get when someone believes in you, it’s the same as when someone doesn’t believe in you. 1 I often think about the times I was ridiculed and mocked for saying my goals in life. The “guarantees” of someone older telling a younger child was impactful, and sure enough, I believed them and stopped. It only became permanent when I convinced myself that they were right. Sure having the wrong people around you scrutinizing and criticizing starts the cycle, but it’s you, the gatekeeper, that decides if it’s true. When you’re inexperienced or in a position of little power, anyone above you seems like the harbinger of truth.

Who is in control?

Unfortunately, the forces, environment, or people around us do dictate how we think and make decisions. Whether good or bad, we can’t help but feel the pressure of those factors. One thing we must remember is that the decision-maker is us. Although excuses might be made that we were influenced, let’s not forget that it is us that ultimately chooses to do it or not. The challenge is to resist the magnetic pull of the “crowd” and step back for a bit to see the bigger picture. The use of detachment from the scenario can often provide you with the best solution. The old saying of “you can’t the forest if you only focus on the tree” holds true here.

Create your system

If you don’t have any system, that’s precisely what you’ll fall back on nothing. Whether it’s mental barriers or advice from someone with no skin in the game, you’ll have to be the one to sort out what’s true and what’s fluff. Know that it’ll be your own personal experiences or failures that’ll lead to parameters set up to stop you. If you decide to address those limitations, know that you’ll have to continuously address them until you’ve convinced yourself that it’s not a limitation any more. Often, it’s having to put in the work and time to do so. It’ll be hard, but once you’ve walked through that door, it’ll be easier to walk through a similar one.

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